complex ceation which is faithfully made.

READ me and you'll know who i am and who am i.

you know you love me.

The 5 LOVE Languages | Piktochart Infographic Editor



yes, time flies.
i never realized that how long i've not posting.
its been 10months i am here in Penang.
how further i am now?
hmm..i feel like years.

the people i know here, i am so closed and so loved.
the ministry i am serving, stretched me and grew me.
the place that i like, i feel so great to be here.

yes, life is not perfect.
it always have defects in the picture.
but i rarely got time for being self-emo anymore.
i am always on the go!!

i am grateful, to have somebody who loves me.
that always treat me like a princess.
nobody treated me like this before except my parents and grandparents.
i can feel the sincerity and warmth.
but i can't help.
this is what i do, i can only leave it to God.
thank you, thank you so much for making me feels so special.
you always encouraged me to be the greater and better me. :)

yes, when someone is looking up to you, but you will still never satisfy!
i am so greedy to have somebody else.
who is always a shadow to me.
gosh..that is so not right.
i know it so clear deep down in mu heart.
let it both gone in my life kay.
i just wanna full-stop these two persons already.
no more expectations and hopes.
leave me alone. yea, this is what i want.
i confess it, and i will do it!
jiayou!!!

huh huh..what else, bunch of lovely people in my life,
making life a wonderful and colorful one.
pray for me dear.
pray for my career, pray for my leadership work, pray for my family.
:)


thanks lot!
p/s: say "hi" to me when u thought of me anytime anywhere! you're always my sunshine! ^^ GBU people!






emo emo emo~
what else? not my career problem now..
what matters? love matters!
gosh..i dun think i can handle another heart broken again..
its lk a feeling of killing myself just to stay away from hurt..
far far...far..away!

i really dun feel lk wanna fall in love again..but..this is my resolution?
oh gosh..havta pay super high attention when Pastor going to preach about Kao-lo-gy(BGR)!!
huh..however..God's love is the best..
human's love always that weak one..
no eyes see!!
crossing finger i am gonna be strong again!
happy early valentine's????

CHEERSSSS!!! *siao*



有时候，我不知道，前方的路，该怎么走下去。
惟有信靠，凭着信念勇敢走下去。

我完全，厌倦了我的工作，一点都不想让它，成为我生命的全部。
而事实上，我必须花上三分之一的时间，再做我不想做的事。
这是何等的一种折磨！！
然而，我并不想就这么放弃回到家乡去！
我很想紧紧抓住我的呼召！

叹！！！
我真的已经不懂该怎么办！
退堂了三份工作（因为不适合）
我不懂是因为这份工作让我有了阴影，
我不敢再情谊的接受一份工作！
尤其是，有女上司的工作！

天啊，有什么事可以让我提起劲来埋头工作吗？
感觉自己快要干掉了！
一方面不停的浇灌成长，一方面却不停地把我往下拉！

怎么办？？？










Dear diary,

You’ve never been forgotten. Life is filled with tons of work and loads of serving. Days have never seems to be easy for me since I join the working club!
Im so sorry dear, never meant to be neglect you. Please allow me to cut my stories short and direct.

ever since i've graduated. i am fully drained with all the pressure to survive on earth. Everything im pursue-ing needs money..needs time..but one thing im so sure after i did my 2013 resolution list..Career is definitely not my main focus..i work..to LIVE!







alright..honestly..has been actively searching for job for the past 2 months..and went up for few job interviews after that..but i've rejected everyone of it til now..still have two pending interviews..heh
seriously, i dun know what should i go for..i think i wish to do sales..but there is one offer for me and require me to go for outstation..at least a week every month..huh! so this is the barrier!
a lot a lot to story..huh..one word to conclude -- "miserable"

fortunately i have lovely leaders and pastors, peers and mentor. a lot of input advises for me. why don't i chase after the talents, giftings and dreams that i ever have in my life?
hmm..yea..i love music..i love singing..and this..is my calling from God!(so far)
still remember the vision i received in "M4J" conference right before i come to PG?
let me tell u, the picture came true!
the vision came true!






i almost forgotten it! but it came true!
this is a biggg step for me..within four months time, God transform me from a nobody to somebody.
i can never imagine myself becoming a worship leader in church. dun even mention about worship leading in City Harvest church..this is like..impossible!
i always think that im suit to become a backup singer..just because i like to sing in second voice..but then..i really never know..i am called to dream bigger!
yes..today im worship leading..not good yet..but im improving time by time..still shivering for stage freight. but its cool! real cool! im happily serving!
though it needs better commitment, higher effort, more time to invest in this bigger role. but im enjoying it and learning at the same time..






thats why..i dun wanna let go of this calling..i dun wanna let go of what i wanna do for Him..
of course, it cost me to pay, to sacrifice..because this is my priority in life!
it has took over the priority even for my work..yes..this is how passion i am doing it..
*sighs* dats y..head super big for thinking of what should i do..

huh..keep on praying hard praying hard..lead me to the right direction please.










tired tired! super tired!
i can sleep even im standing still now!
fuhh..when to have a peaceful day and night for me and i have nothing to do with?
ahh..schedule super full now..my whole month of Oct is reserved wei.
like dunnp doin what big big business project.
ah dui!!! i wanna sleep!!!

almost fall asleep during meeting just now. shhhh...! dun tell anyone! paiseh lo..yor..=p



懂得捍卫爱情的人，才是真的懂得尊重爱情的人。
爱，是非卖品。
爱，是无价的。
不是礼让，就可会有另一个“大团圆”结局。

你，学会了吗？





...speechless speechless..
its been quite awhile i never write?
yeh..i;ve been super busy until i have no time to get myself enough rest too.

its been going thru the down tides in life.
well, its nothing other than stress.
stress until i wanna cry my lungs out!!
yeh right, my tears flooded my past few weeks.

i was in the midst of quiting my job.
but i ended up still here.
no choice, i can't pay that much and just breach the contract!
more than 7k man!! its not worth for me to do so!!
so heres my new way of seeing my job.
im trying my very best to take it easy dy.
not only pleasing the boss with my best result..
i have to go beyond.
try to understand her at her stand.
treat all the bad feedback as a push for me to go further.
hopefully one day i will just immune to it and grow even stronger!
this is the chance for me to grow to the max!


hmm..=)
what makes me til here today?
except the support from my friends and family,
the most thing i thankful is the great wisdom from God.
my gosh, His words always encourage me.
sometimes the pain in my heart is killing.
but yet, i know, i have to overcome it.

when i lost faith, He reminds me of the blood of Jesus.
what makes him sacrifice for a fool like me?
and what can i sacrifice to bring Glory to him?
im so impressed!





ok! lets run out from the dark zone!
hmm..its been 3months in Penang.
what i can say is financial crisis is coming on me.LOL
its been a month i joining CHC.
petrol is not only the problem.
i have to pledge for the building fund man!
and my cell group is like..so happening gang!
everytime i go fellowship with them i will spend at least rm50!
the yumcha place is something like "delicious" "starbucks" "coffeebean"
u know, 90% in the cell are engineers!
thats mean they have better pay la!
ahdui..wanna faint ah me..can u imagine one week i have to go church or outing for 6days?
siao one..lol
i know its crazy enough..and im using up not only my salary and also my savings to cover up the spending.
soon i will be empty dy!
after the pledge months of course have to start saving!
now planning to invest a keyboard?
ah..so pressure!



and i have been recruited to the praise and worship team!
after i got shouted from the Pastor but yeah! its a great opportunity to advance my skill!
lol..He was a pastor who like to scream and shout onto you.
but no doubt, he is still a good pastor!haha
i will never forget that day he suddenly pop up and wanted to audit me!
its suppose to audit by the song leader.
just because one of bro from s'pore told him about me!
siao man! i only knew that after the audition!
but praise God also la..if its not because of him, i wont know that i am so timid until i shivered all time in the stage!
and i din know i can sing 3 octaves too!
lol..i was giving up at the half way of singing, but Pastor shouted at me "try la wei!! you haven't try how you know?!"
then i ended up going up two keys somemore! wah! i was surprised by myself also! LOL
Holy Spirit kott?haha

so yeah! im starting to serve this week!!haha
so gan cheong and so happy!
super big commitment now..prac every week and start attending vocal lessons.
and also financial investment!lol..
lessons fees la, have to get a good earpiece la, have to buy jacket la, have to buy heels somemore! thats compulsory to be on the stage!
seriously no budget for any of it now..i have my financial plan dy..i never expect i can serve that soon.lol
its out of a sudden!
sumore have to serve in the main service!
i dunno about u la..bt its a "wow" for me!
i think i never wearing heels and stand on the stage facing 400 people for the last 22years before!LOL
Pastor dun want me to serve in chinese ministry but the main service.
thats mean he is looking up for me! stress sial!! he will squish me until i dry dy!
but too bad, the duty i got also i cant attend because of my convocation thing!
sobs!
but nvm! this week got another chance to try myself at the chinese ministry first!haha
replacing somebody who is on emergency! lol
well..God's timing..=p

okie..what now..its going to be a long long weekend for me again..going to spend my weekend at church for the whole day!
my schedule is really so pack! but im learning how to enjoy it!
i busy until i have to use up my lunch time to memorise lyrics! lol
really no time at all!

hmm..what is taking my breathe is another feeling.
the "cant't help falling in love" feelings.
phew..so tired la..to make myself stop thinking about tat person.
it really took me so long to recover dy..but yet..the feeling..is like..
when i cut it off, it will grow like my hair growing out.
how many times i have to "shave" it only it will disappear?
its not love dy right? stop confusing myself la!
i just wanna focus.
ish..just because of  "that guy" told me something about his stories.
which is really similar to mine.
it brings me into this mess again.
theres always something to ping me with my memories one.
the door will not open itself one right?
yes lor..thats y lo..i cnt control. >.<

haiyo, this bgr thing ah..sien la!
stay single can or not???? =.=





im not that kind of person who give up easily.
but this is too much.
i wanna go! i wanna go!
leave me alone!!
because you screwed the world!!





“人受考验的人有福了，

                                       他们通过了考验，

                                                                   就必得着生命的冠冕，





my new family members!



however, i really can feel the stress right at this moment!
as the church is going to move in to a new place.
everyone has more opportunity to serve.
and even more people need to serve!
thats why pastor want each of everyone of us serve in two ministry.
and for sure, more pledge need to be raised.
even greater commitment to to be done!

im on the way of getting myself ready for all this.
but frankly speaking, i hope i wont burn up.
the stress level in the work place is really dragging me down all time.
trying to clique with the church is another challenge.
picking up my skill is my big headache now.
and better financial planning is soooo needed!
woosh!!
i ran no time doing chores for last week!
first time encountered something like this huh!
time consuming everything to get things done!
and yet, i submit everything!
i ask God to take my best for him!
because..i surrender all..


















i wanted to dance and jump as mad as possible just for Thee.
Thou shall receive every praises of mine! <3 p="p">