complex ceation which is faithfully made.

READ me and you'll know who i am and who am i.

you know you love me.

...speechless speechless..
its been quite awhile i never write?
yeh..i;ve been super busy until i have no time to get myself enough rest too.

its been going thru the down tides in life.
well, its nothing other than stress.
stress until i wanna cry my lungs out!!
yeh right, my tears flooded my past few weeks.

i was in the midst of quiting my job.
but i ended up still here.
no choice, i can't pay that much and just breach the contract!
more than 7k man!! its not worth for me to do so!!
so heres my new way of seeing my job.
im trying my very best to take it easy dy.
not only pleasing the boss with my best result..
i have to go beyond.
try to understand her at her stand.
treat all the bad feedback as a push for me to go further.
hopefully one day i will just immune to it and grow even stronger!
this is the chance for me to grow to the max!


hmm..=)
what makes me til here today?
except the support from my friends and family,
the most thing i thankful is the great wisdom from God.
my gosh, His words always encourage me.
sometimes the pain in my heart is killing.
but yet, i know, i have to overcome it.

when i lost faith, He reminds me of the blood of Jesus.
what makes him sacrifice for a fool like me?
and what can i sacrifice to bring Glory to him?
im so impressed!





ok! lets run out from the dark zone!
hmm..its been 3months in Penang.
what i can say is financial crisis is coming on me.LOL
its been a month i joining CHC.
petrol is not only the problem.
i have to pledge for the building fund man!
and my cell group is like..so happening gang!
everytime i go fellowship with them i will spend at least rm50!
the yumcha place is something like "delicious" "starbucks" "coffeebean"
u know, 90% in the cell are engineers!
thats mean they have better pay la!
ahdui..wanna faint ah me..can u imagine one week i have to go church or outing for 6days?
siao one..lol
i know its crazy enough..and im using up not only my salary and also my savings to cover up the spending.
soon i will be empty dy!
after the pledge months of course have to start saving!
now planning to invest a keyboard?
ah..so pressure!



and i have been recruited to the praise and worship team!
after i got shouted from the Pastor but yeah! its a great opportunity to advance my skill!
lol..He was a pastor who like to scream and shout onto you.
but no doubt, he is still a good pastor!haha
i will never forget that day he suddenly pop up and wanted to audit me!
its suppose to audit by the song leader.
just because one of bro from s'pore told him about me!
siao man! i only knew that after the audition!
but praise God also la..if its not because of him, i wont know that i am so timid until i shivered all time in the stage!
and i din know i can sing 3 octaves too!
lol..i was giving up at the half way of singing, but Pastor shouted at me "try la wei!! you haven't try how you know?!"
then i ended up going up two keys somemore! wah! i was surprised by myself also! LOL
Holy Spirit kott?haha

so yeah! im starting to serve this week!!haha
so gan cheong and so happy!
super big commitment now..prac every week and start attending vocal lessons.
and also financial investment!lol..
lessons fees la, have to get a good earpiece la, have to buy jacket la, have to buy heels somemore! thats compulsory to be on the stage!
seriously no budget for any of it now..i have my financial plan dy..i never expect i can serve that soon.lol
its out of a sudden!
sumore have to serve in the main service!
i dunno about u la..bt its a "wow" for me!
i think i never wearing heels and stand on the stage facing 400 people for the last 22years before!LOL
Pastor dun want me to serve in chinese ministry but the main service.
thats mean he is looking up for me! stress sial!! he will squish me until i dry dy!
but too bad, the duty i got also i cant attend because of my convocation thing!
sobs!
but nvm! this week got another chance to try myself at the chinese ministry first!haha
replacing somebody who is on emergency! lol
well..God's timing..=p

okie..what now..its going to be a long long weekend for me again..going to spend my weekend at church for the whole day!
my schedule is really so pack! but im learning how to enjoy it!
i busy until i have to use up my lunch time to memorise lyrics! lol
really no time at all!

hmm..what is taking my breathe is another feeling.
the "cant't help falling in love" feelings.
phew..so tired la..to make myself stop thinking about tat person.
it really took me so long to recover dy..but yet..the feeling..is like..
when i cut it off, it will grow like my hair growing out.
how many times i have to "shave" it only it will disappear?
its not love dy right? stop confusing myself la!
i just wanna focus.
ish..just because of  "that guy" told me something about his stories.
which is really similar to mine.
it brings me into this mess again.
theres always something to ping me with my memories one.
the door will not open itself one right?
yes lor..thats y lo..i cnt control. >.<

haiyo, this bgr thing ah..sien la!
stay single can or not???? =.=